Have some money to invest. Help me make up my mind on which shitcoin to buy next

Hey there folks. I have some money to invest and I am looking to pick one of these two coins.

DIA: Based on my research, DIA seems like LINK but less centralized. It's also trading at about the same value it ICO'd so could be a good pick?

XHV: Price 10x'd this year already but its market cap is still fairly low. It's a stable, private coin, based on Monero.

I don't see much long term potential in either but do you think I could ride one of these for a few months and hope they do a 5-10x?

Or shill me any other low mcap coins. The crappier the better.