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r/AskParents • … • u/Magnificent_Squirrel

Should I get my niece a small gift when I give her siblings their birthday gifts?

My brother and his family live far from us and we only see them a few times/year. Usually when I see them, I have a little present for all 3 kids (almost 11f, 7f, almost 5m) because I don't see them often so I try to spoil them a little when I do. Birthday/Christmas gifts get shipped directly to their house. However next week they are going to be in town and it happens to be close to the eldest and youngest's birthdays. Since they'll be here I'll be giving their birthday presents in person for the first time ever.

But then I wondered if the middle would feel left out and maybe I should get her a little something too? Her birthday is in January and I sent a very nice gift at the time. My brother and his wife are very down to earth people and don't spoil their kids so I know their opinion would be "it's not her birthday, she doesn't need a present". But I was the middle child in my family growing up and I remember how it felt like I was always the forgotten kid that nobody paid attention to.

If I just get her something small like a stuffed animal or a book and give it to her unwrapped the way I normally would for all 3, are the other 2 going to complain that they didn't get anything on her birthday? How would other people handle this?

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