Struggling with the Vatican's stance on transgender people

Hello, I want to precede this by saying I'm not here with the intent to argue, but to be educated and hopefully come to an understanding on the Church's practice.

I'm not Catholic, and was not raised Catholic, but want to become a member of the Church because I believe in her teachings. The major issue I have with the prospect of initiation is that I am transgender, I live my life as a gender I was not assigned at birth, and from my (admittedly limited understanding) this is in direct contradiction with the teachings of the Church.

Why does living my life in a way that feels honest and right have to come between me and the Church? Why would God who loves me without end let me suffer from gender dysphoria if He does not want me to act in accordance with it and transition? I'm just left confused and troubled. My apologies if I'm being disrespectful, it's genuinely not my attention.