What was the life you envisioned for yourself as a kid/young adult? Do you get upset when you see other people living that life? Cause I do

I was running some errands today and I had to drive through the city. While I was at a light I saw a big group of professionals (I think they were lawyers but idk exactly) leave a building. They were all around my age (30ish) and had clearly just gotten out of some big meeting...and seeing them kind of ruined my day.

I've never been able to have a job. I went to school to try and enter the non-profit sector but my health deteriorated just as I got my bachelor's (after eight years) and I've never done anything beyond that. Seeing people my age live the life I envisioned for myself always triggers some sort of depression episode and I fucking hate it. This isn't the life I wanted for myself. I'm currently curled up on the couch trying not to sob because a day of running errands has left me incapacitated. I can only sit and imagine what I would have been doing right now if I were healthy, and the thought genuinely churns my stomach.

So yeah my day's going great. How are you guys?