One day a family walks into a talent agency, and asks for an audition.

There's a Grandmother, a Dad, a Mom, a Son, a Daughter and a dog. The Dad says, "We have a great act, and we're looking for gigs."

The talent agent asks to see the act.

First the Dad walks onto the stage. He produces a trumpet from a case. He drops his pants, and proceeds to play the trumpet with his butthole. While he's doing this the Mom and Grandma join him on stage and do a dance. When he approaches the finale of the song the three of them form one of those chorus lines where they kick their legs in step. This is pretty impressive, as the Dad is no longer holding onto the trumpet with his hands, but seems to be quite competent to continue playing the trumpet. The Son and Daughter join into the show, and they all do jazz hands for the last few moments of the song. This is where it all starts to get weird.

At this point they reveal that Mom is extremely flexible, and she puts herself into an unusual position, while she and Dad manage to shift the trumpet from his butthole to hers. The resulting configuration leaves the skinny part of the trumpet exposed, and the wide part of the trumpet securely lodged where the sun don't shine. The family proceeds to take turns blowing into the trumpet. While the trumpet itself is muted, and not making much sound, the mom sings your favorite Katie Perry song. It doesn't matter what song this is, but you know you have a favorite Katie Perry song.

They turn the Mom back over (yeah, she was upside down), and attach a car battery to her nipples with jumper cables. The mom expels the trumpet from her behind, which ricochets off the stage, only to be deftly caught by the daughter, who proceeds to twirl it like a baton, while grandma launches into a rendition of sweet dreams by Eurythmics. The Dad beatboxes, while the son provides a rhythm by touching the positive battery connection with the jumper cables.

At the end of the song, everyone strips down, revealing that they were all wearing giant purple strap on dildos (yes, even the males). This is where the dog comes into play. If you're still reading this, and you object to a family sexually abusing a dog with giant purple strap on dildos, maybe you should read a different joke, or at least image that the dildos are a more acceptable color for your personal tastes.

So the Dad puts the wide part of the trumpet into the grandma's ass. The daughter puts the mouthpiece of the trumpet in her own ass. The son puts a giant purple dildo into the daughter's mouth. The mom puts Skippy peanut butter into the son's ass. The dog starts eating the peanut butter out of the sons ass. The mom starts fucking the dog with her giant purple dildo. The Dad puts peanut butter into the mom's ass. He starts eating the peanut butter out of the mom's ass. The grandma starts sucking on his giant purple dildo (I apologize if purple is an offensive color, please imagine them to be a different color). The daughter starts sucking the dog's dick. The grandma starts fucking the dad's ass with her giant dildo, honestly, it doesn't matter what color it is. At this point, asses start leaking onto the stage. It's kinda hard to tell if it's just Skippy peanut butter, or if it's actually Skippy peanut butter and shit. No, wait, it's definitely both. There is without doubt shit and peanut butter leaking all over. The grandma decides it's time to ramp the show up, and pulls the trumpet from her ass. She holds the daughter down and pisses into the trumpet. The rest of the family takes of the dildos of whatever color you prefer, and take turns pissing into the trumpet while singing come as you are by Nirvana. The son dumps the rest of the peanut butter into the trumpet, and the family takes turns with a filthy plunger, making sure that all the the piss and peanut butter find the way into the daughter's rectum. The Dad flips the daughter over (she was right side up), and they turn the dog loose on her ass. The dog tries to eat all the peanut butter, while being sprayed with all the piss, and slipping around in all the peanut butter and shit, while the family sings Imagine by John Lennon.

When the song is done, they all take a bow.

The talent agent says, "That's one hell of an act, what do you call yourselfs?"

The Dad says, "We don't have a name yet, but for an extra $20 we'll do it with a set of bagpipes."