Indian Men abandon their wives at their most vulnerable and our culture encourages it.

I realized this as my FIL gave me some shit "advice" about my baby who is going through a sleep regression. He commented that my husband was a great sleeper when he was a baby. I asked him whether he lived with his wife when my husband was 0-2months. He said no. In fact, my MIL was sent away at 8 months, and didn't come back until the baby was 2 months. I understand wanting to be with mom but this is compounded by the fact that inlaws and the husband are expected to do jackshit for the baby who takes on the fathers last name! Apparently the mothers family also is expected to pay for the childbirth if its a girl???? Its ridiculous. My MIL confided in me that she was thankful to leave because my FIL was useless, but how is leaving your wife alone during the most challenging months of her life and your baby's life acceptable behavior in our society?

Most of our fathers' generations (and even this generation to a large extent) men are excluded from their baby's first months of life. This period is so important for father-child bonding and mom-dad bonding. They literally know nothing about how hard it is.

I cant imagine surviving the last month of pregnancy and the first two months of my childrens' birth without my husband AND mom and dad supporting me. My dad confided in my that it was the first time he had experience with a new born baby properly because my mom was at her parents. I could see he was devastated that he missed out on ours.

We need to do better.