Spilled Thrush Meds :'(

Need some comiseration about feeling like a failure over a setback.

Tired and clumsy I spilled nearly half of a 60$ medication that I desperately need to help my baby keep breastfeeding comfortably.

This medicine has been giving me back my ability to nurse her during her awake time, to see her happy and not screaming at my boobs. It's working better than the nystatin, but this is the 3rd course of an antifungal so I desperately want it to work. And I bloody dropped it.

For a good 30 minutes I cried and felt like I was dooming my child to misery while eating and sabotaging my own ability to feed my baby. My SO came over and reassured me that if we need to we will go back to the Dr and get more, and that helps but I'm so mad at myself and sad for my baby that I might have set us up for more days of screaming in pain when she should be nursing.

I know we'll get through this, even if we have to go through it yet again. It's just hard because breastfeeding was finally feeling comfortable again, and I feel like I've metaphorically banged my already bruised shin. My own incompetent fingers are my enemy today. Is it too much wishful thinking to hope for it to stay easier? I want the half left to be enough, I'm so tired of putting cream on and having to bleach my bras, and seeing my child crying because she either hates eating, or hates the medication. :(