I'm concerned my newborn will come to think their name is "Sir..."

In my effort to cope with living with a newborn I've taken to treating my boy as a disgruntled customer when he cries. I'll be marching him off for a diaper change and just saying things like:

"Sir, sir, you are being unreasonable."

"Sir, this behavior is unacceptable."

"Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

"Sir, I am the manager."

... It helps.