LCBO Strike was a relief, and now what.

Hi everyone! Alcoholic here living in Ontario. I was sober for a year and a half before the pandemic, and then things started slipping for me about a year in with isolation and lack of supports. I got back on track, and then slipped and it's been a bit of a yoyo since. For a bit I was convincing myself I could do moderation, and it kind of looked like that for a time. Would take breaks for a few weeks / month, then start drinking again. More recently it's become a regular thing, and although not nearly as bad as before I first quit (was drinking half micky a day + bottle of wine and some beers), it's affecting me just as bad. Actually I find my tolerance is worse, hangovers worse, and energy levels down. I hate it. I find this time of year especially challenging as there is more socialising and I enjoy sitting in my yard with a beer (although honestly, non alcoholic ginger beer is just as good). Haven't had energy to go to the gym, and have missed some work. Also meds I'm on these days don't react so well with booze. Was enjoying taking a break while the LCBO was on strike the last couple of weeks (that's our government run liquor store). Had a lot more sober days and when I did drink it was just a pint at one of the local breweries. The LCBO is back open now. On my way home from work I told myself I wasn't going in, and went in a different direction instead and stopped at a nice food store to get some things. And then that voice said, what's the big deal, we'll just go check it out. Well didn't I wake up with the worst hangover today. Was looking forward to the day and now I can't do anything. Definitely need to stop this yoyo. I've tried some local groups but the AA groups here are super religious (I live in a small city in a conservative part of the country). I didn't feel comfortable, especially as a gay guy who has not always had a great time with Christianity. I've tried some on line groups, through SMART recovery and they were so busy I found them intimidating (an some people were pretty volatile and needed a more intense group). Also when I went to an LGBTQ group it was mostly straight people and that was really uncomfortable. Does anyone have any suggestions on online recovery groups. Also any words of encouragement for someone doing day 1 again for the hundredth or so time are always appreciated.