See y'all at 1234

Igor is the personification of my alcoholism. He is the guy that sleeps on your couch in hopes of better days. He would often tells me how shitty people were not to listen to me, agree with all my biased thoughts and generally have that "yeah fu©k it" attitude.

Last night i dreamt that i sipped a beer by mistake and that it awoke Igor. I finished the rest of the pint with that fu©k it attitude and felt a snap of regret, so close to this milestone.

I don't want to feel that regret IRL, i have enough of them already. I'm grateful for theses past 2 years and a smidge. I have been able to face life with my head high and clear. Imma continue down this route and see where it goes, no Igor choosing the path for me.

Complacency is now my #1 enemy, whenever Igors attitude comes knocking i'll remember what was and play the tape forward. I know where that goes.

I don't know where my life is heading, i don't feel "in control" over many aspects of life. And that is a good thing in my eyes, the only times i have felt "in control" was in self destruction.

I got the feeling this is the beginning of the end of milestones here. I missed most of them and got my days mixed up more than twice lol so it feels nice to get this one on time.

Yesterday has come to to pass and there is nothing that can change that. Tomorrow is unknown and largely unpredictable, no point on dwelling on what might be. Now is where we have the power to act, therefore that's where i choose to live.

IWNDWYT