I drank last week

Hey all, posting this for the accountability. I quit in March of this year and made it through an international trip, two famlily vacations, a trip home for a funeral, a wedding, halloween, my birthday, and thanksgiving. not even tempted really, thought it was easy. I was done.

last week I was sitting at home alone and I drank some of my wife’s rum on impulse. Was bored, thought it would be fun, thought maybe I could do a shot and be good. maybe I could be normal. Nope. had maybe five shots worth, felt awful the next day.

two days later I did it again. then a third time just Saturday night, although less that time.

felt like absolute shit every time, during and after. turns out there is no “normal drinking” for me. and there’s nothing left in it to enjoy. it wasn’t fun, or exciting. The terrible feeling the next day was too familiar. waking up groggy and exhausted with a headache and feeling shame.

so anyways, there it is. did my field research, reconfirmed my conclusion. I won’t be drinking with you today.

edit: thanks for all the support everyone! This community is so great