2 decade relapse

I haven’t smoked since I was 24ish. I’m 42. I smoked a lot back then. I quit cold turkey and never looked back. I had a few cigarettes last October while on a trip to NY. I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis two years ago- cigarettes are terrible for this disease. I had a few cigarettes with coworkers a month ago. Bought a pack. I have had three now over the course of a week. I told my mom. She said to soak them in water. I’m not sure what I’m doing and I’m writing this because I am a little afraid. What have I done. Have I opened the door? Is it ok to have a cig now and then, Or am I delusional and getting back into them? I think I know the answer.

Edit: after writing this- and reflecting, I soaked them in water and crumpled them up. I hope it’s over.