Help! First time playing and my Dom left for Burn right after.

I (Fsub35) am very new to BDSM. I spent ten years celibate in my twenties helping run a women's healing space and then had a few years of medical celibacy-I had heart surgery last year on a birth defect and decided that when I recovered, I would no longer be celibate.

I had never met anyone offline, and after a five month deeply unsatisfying relationship in all ways I decided to try online dating. I exchanged numbers with someone who opened my mind up to kink. We still havent met, plan to, but he really put ideas in my head that made me research, and start playing alone. Ive def been in sub frenzy and controlling it. I made the decision to enter into dating ENM after being monogamous my whole life.

The first person I met offline is now my Daddy (MDom41) and we had a nice date last Friday after a week or two of talking. He came over on Tuesday morning before leaving for burning man and we played for the first time, and it was my first time playing in a real negotiated power play dynamic (service/soft/ddlg). He went down on me for hours, not allowing me to touch him in any way other than to kiss him/rub his head. He said he wanted me to understand that he didnt want anything from me. At one point I was begging him, telling him I was cumming too much, I wanted him, but he called me a good girl and taught me to call him Sir or Daddy, it was genuinely lovely, I went deeper into subspace than I ever have.

Then he left, right then, and went to Burn. I got a few calls from him that evening and the next day, and when I started to drop he checked in telling me he wished he was with me and if he was that he'd take care of me, hold me, wash me, etc. But he wasnt there. I thought can handle this because it felt like the drop after playing alone. He called one last time to tell me that 15,000 people would show up soon and cut out service the rest of the week. I took a bath and went to bed.

When I woke up I felt terrible, and it kept getting worse. As a heart patient I sleep with oxygen and need a new pulmonary valve, if I think I'm getting sick I get very anxious and think I may have heart problems because its happened in the past to where my heart overworks when im ill and I have a small heart attack and end up in the hospital. So I was worried, I didnt know it was still sub drop. It kept going and I got more depressed. More anxious. I felt like he wouldnt let me touch him because he didnt went me and he must be having sex at burning man even though he only has two people he plays with including me, it got really bad, I felt on the edge of some dark cliff tbh not knowing how far I'd drop or even what was happening...I texted him even though he couldnt see the texts, I texted my other person (we havent met but have talked for 3 months) that I was in subdrop and struggling, we set up a date (hes also out of town, but will be back a week sooner than my Daddy).

I finally had a friend over and that really seemed to help, we just talked for a few hours. Now I'm alone and feel a bit bad again, but not as bad as before. I dont think I can play with Daddy if he's leaving town..should I negotiate this with him? Was it like this because it was my first time? (I feel somewhat afraid of subspace/drop now) Was this responsible of him for my first time ever? Can I do anything to help the drop? Thank you lovely people<3