Sysadmin as ADHD.

I posted a while back, and it was somewhat well received, and ... a few people contacted me directly expressing that they'd actually managed to make a big difference to their lives.

So I'm posting again, and I hope I don't manage to bore you this time either.

I was diagnosed with ADHD 36 months ago, at age 43.

I had _never realised_ that was what was going on, but I'd got to a very bad state in terms of mental health, burnout, depression and anxiety.

Through it all, I've been a sysadmin - and I like to think I'm pretty good at it, because 25 years in no one's sacked me yet.

So before you think of the stereotype of ADHD, and dismiss this, I'd ask if you would kindly bear with me just a couple more paragraphs. Put aside what you think you know for a moment.

ADHD is a problem of executive function.

It's about having difficulties with focussing on things - in both directions, so you might find you get hyperfocussed on something you shouldn't, but then can't focus on something else that you _really should_.

It meddles with your sense of time - it's very commonly associated with both being routinely late/delayed, but _also_ obsessively 'on time' as a developed coping strategy.

It meddles with your impulsivity and sense of risk taking.

And it means your short term/working memory is 'not great' - you're not so much forgetful, as 'didn't save it to disk' forgetful, but it still means it can be hard to recount your recent actions and activities. (Which with the time awareness things means that 'filling out timesheets' is particularly uncomfortable for me!)

And it meddles with your 'motivational circuits' such that whilst most people will do fine with 'Consequences/Rewards/Importance' - e.g. 'employment' - a person with ADHD finds it intrinsically hard to be motivated by such things, but _will_ find Interest, Challenge, Novelty and/or Urgency very motivating.

And the reason I want to post this - again - is I think there is considerable selection bias pressure in the profession. Indeed a whole bunch of 'best practices' like ticketing systems and change control look eerily similar to 'coping strategies' for managing ADHD. I don't think that's a coincidence.

Indeed the very notion of a 'major incident' - where I'm handling a situation with incomplete information, multiple potential competing factors, multiple possible options for diagnosis/analysis and resolution, and an outage that 'needs to work as soon as possible' is in many ways something I have spent my _life_ practicing.

Because that's my normal day, as a result of problems with executive function.

If that sounds eerily familiar, and you're tempted to shrug with 'yes, but everyone does that'... you might well be wrong, it's just what _you_ are used to.

The 'maybe worth talking to a doctor' criteria can be found on the 'Adult Self Report Scale' for ADHD.

Feel free to search yourself, there are multiple options, but for the sake of convenience here's a link to [ADD.ORG's version](https://add.org/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/adhd-questionnaire-ASRS111.pdf). It's a couple of pages long, but there's really only 6 questions that 'matter' as indicators.

- How often do you have trouble wrapping up the final details of a project, once the challenging parts have been done?

- How often do you have difficulty getting things in order when you have to do a task that requires organization?

- How often do you have problems remembering appointments or obligations?

- When you have a task that requires a lot of thought, how often do you avoid or delay getting started?

- How often do you fidget or squirm with your hands or feet when you have to sit down for a long time?

- How often do you feel overly active and compelled to do things, like you were driven by a motor?

(If you answer 'often' or 'very often' to 4 or more of these, then it's worth digging deeper).

Anyway, I just want to say my life has got such a lot better since being diagnosed and treated. It's felt ... kinda like being on holiday. Nothing has _really_ changed, it's just a lot of it is easier/less stressful and it's been considerably easier to be functional and happy since.

Depending on who's estimates you use 3-10% of the population have ADHD, so it's not all _that_ uncommon, and that's assuming a true random sample. I'd be prepared to bet that most of us don't have a 'true random sample' of people, and so it _can_ seem a lot more common in certain pockets and subgroups.

Sysadmin I believe is one.

(Also a bunch of "nerdy" hobbies and interests)

And yes, here in the UK in particular there's been a bunch of negative coverage recently.

I think if you look closely though, the headlines do not match the evidence as presented.