WHERE DID MY FILES GO?!?!!!1!1!

Let begin the tale of the difference between the $PNAPVPN and the $corpvpn. $PNAPAPPS live on the $PNAPRDP, and $corpapps live on citrix. It begins with me receiving a ticket from second level support, where second level documents that $PNAPAPPS can be accessed from $corpvpn. This confuses me, until I notice two things. it was a particular second level who did the forward, and she doesn't pay attention to their email or training, and $users signature on the ticket indicates that they're a director, likely female from the name. They forward it to desktop support, which is where I enter the fray.

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A smail bit of background, $BIGcorp devoured $littlecorp, and had no use for their IT department save 3 men, until 1. everyone complained at $littlecorp that their issues were being ignored, and 2. the building caught fire because of dust in the network cabinet from no one having the time to maintain anything that wasn't software. It was a little fire, just required redoing the network cabinet and running a few new lines. That bit of history came from a convo between $networkman and $serverman as they regaled the havoc of $duncebillingboss who was the safety man for his floor because the smoke detectors weren't working. He fled the building without alerting his wing, AND THEY NEVER SHOWED at the designated area.

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Anyway, the $corp and $PNAP systems remain separate to this day. all network resources can be accessed locally from either side, but both VPNs are less tolerant of resolving names for the other side. IP addresses work though, and $BIGcorp was thoughtful enough to put in IP shortcuts for their users for the frequently accessed stuff. $littlecompany didn't, but then, we were rarely in the position of needing access to $BIGcorps network resources except citrix, and everyone knew the citrix rules anyway.

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$littlecompany workstaions which I administer are immune to most of the policies of $BIGcorp. $BIGcorp couldn't figure a way to integrate all the $PNAPAPPS into citrix, so $PNAPAPPS remained where they were safe from the inevitable data corruption that befell the first app they did try to merge. $littlecompany was back up after an hour of the failure, $BIGcorp was down for... I don't actually know, but $serverman's maniacal laughter after the tale tells me it wasn't pretty.

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They bought me in as a contractor to bridge the gap, and see if any of the ancient knowledge from the could be dug up, and to take over the desktop ticket load from $serverman, so that he could actually be $serverman. He assisted me with a bit, and there were a few hangups.

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Small bit, right?...

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I look over the ticket, and all second level did was verify connectivity to $corpvpn, and try to ping the $PNAPRDP, which didn't resolve. It drops ICMP anyway, so pinging it is moot.

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I contact user over IM, and get a phone number. It's $littlecompanys area code, so this was probably going to be easy.

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me: Hi, this is $chroniclesoffire, IT

$user (Yup, female): Oh thank goodness. I've got to get these reports done, and quick. Why can't I get connected to $PNAPAPPS, I'm connected to VPN!

me: which VPN?

$user: does it really matter?

me: it does if you want to get to $corpapps or $PNAPAPPS.

$user: they told me to use $corpvpn for everything!

me: Well, you can only get to $PNAPAPPS from $PNAPVPN

$user: Okay, well, I don't know how to use $PNAPVPN, could you show me?

me: sure thing, let me connect using $remotesoftware.

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I connect to her computer, and there are desktop icons covering the whole screen. it's mostly Excel sheets with a few Word docs dropped in. I can't find $PNAPVPN, and $remotesoftware is feeling very sluggish, but that could just be her home internet. I open the desktop folder in explorer, and do find it when searching by name. That's when I notice a shortcut that is only on $BIGcorps computers, right next to $PNAPVPN. I know what's coming next. I must have audibly sighed...

$user: whats wrong?

I disconnect from $corpvpn. Suddenly $remotesoftware sped up.

$user: WHERE'D MY FILES GO?!?!

I pull the phone from my ear. I pause a moment, then holding the mouthpiece to my mouth and the earpiece far away from my ear...

me: They're fine. They're only there when you're connected to the network.

$user: PUT THEM BACK!!

me: we will get to them, but we need to-

$user: I SAID PUT THEM BACK!!!

me: where they there before you connected to $corpvpn?

$user: YES!!!

me: (LIAR!) They couldn't have been. $BIGcorp keeps your personal files on a network path. If you disconnect from $corpvpn, your computer can't find them.

$user: I don't care about that!

me: What about being able to connect to $PNAPAPPS?

$user: I NEED THEM BOTH!!! PUT MY FILES BACK!

me: I can get you connected to both. (Which I would've said long ago if you'd just let me explain. But it won't be exactly as you want it...)

$user: DO IT!!!!

Now that $PNAPVPN has room to show on the desktop, it does so, right next to $BIGcorp shortcut. I open it.

me: go ahead and enter your username and $littlecompany password.

I watch them enter their credntials. error: authentication failed.

me: did you enter $littlecompany password?

$user: I don't have one of those.

I pause a second. wait for it... wait for it... ??? Nooooo, don't tell me...

me: try your $PNAPapp1 password.