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r/vegancirclejerk • … • u/Drew_pew

How to deny a funding request for elephant tusks

Hi everyone, I've run into a weird situation that I need advice on.

I am vegan, and I think consuming animal products is wrong almost all of the time (meat Tuesdays being the obvious exception). I am the president of the United States, a member of my country's governing body, in which I help disperse funds. A lobbying group requested millions dollars worth of assault rifles and nets to catch elephants to obtain ivory. After some research, I've discovered the elephants do not like having their tusks taken, nor do they like being left to die after the tusks are cut off. I do not want to give them the money they requested because I think this is wrong. I am able to veto bills on my own discretion, but I'm supposed to have a legitimate reason why. Many others might not see my reasoning as legitimate and I might not get funding from the ivory lobby if I veto this bill :(

Am I crazy for thinking this? Is it really that bad since they would be using the ivory to make super cool shit like pianos and cue balls? I would love to hear opinions from fellow vegans!

Update: I will be letting the poachers do whatever the fuck they want. Basically what right do I have to stop them from murdering as many elephants as they can find? I'm going to pass this decision to my vice president Ivory McPoacher.

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