Another autistic options question

I believe I have found something that is mathematically incapable of fucking me over.

100 shares of MVIS costs 149. MVIS trades at 1.49

Selling a covered call 02/19/2021 1c gets me 80 dollars.

Now here's the funky money math.

If I get assigned, I win. I made 80 on the premium and lost 49 on the sale. (Of course I'm gonna probably buy 1k shares and sell 10 contracts, at a minimum). I'd I get assigned, I'm guaranteed a 20% gain. Maybe I get assigned immediately maybe I don't. Doesn't matter, 20% locked in

If MVIS goes up, I win. If it goes up I'm absofuckinglutely getting assigned. See above

If MVIS goes down, I also win. Because of the premium, MVIS can go down to .69 before I experience even a penny of loss. If MVIS goes down I can just buy out the call because you better fucking believe thats going down in price as the stock falls

If MVIS does nothing I win again

Literally why doesn't everyone sell covered ITM calls if the premium offsets the difference in your buy and strike price