Going on? (Rant)

My family keeps telling me that I have to go on. That my wife left me money so that I could live a good life. How am I supposed to do that without her? We could make each other happy just by walking into the room and now I've just "celebrated" our wedding anniversary, the 2nd one without her... It brought nothing but weeks of the blackest depression and despair. Certainly nothing worth living for there!

And how exactly do they presume to know what my wife would have wanted?! Even my father-in-law is trying to convince me of how well he knew his daughter, and that she would have wanted a good life for me, but he wasn't a part of that life for years! These people don't know the intimate conversations that were part of our marriage!! They don't understand how much we knew that we would never be able to survive without each other, how we both said we would rather kill ourselves than lose one another. We even made arrangements for visiting an assisted suicide clinic in Switzerland in our old age so that we could die together instead of ever being separated.

And yet even though I died by my own hand 6 months ago, I am still here, and my family still wants me to keep limping on through this shadow of an existence. Why?? What is the point?