I can’t remember what my husband was wearing when he died / and why am I doing this to myself?

Tonight at the bottom of the hamper I found the “personal effects” bag that came from the funeral home or hospital or wherever. I apparently had opened it previously and do remember taking his wallet out.

His shorts and skivvies were in there but not his tshirt. I know he didn’t have it on in the hospital when they stopped CPR. So I assume they took it off or cut it off in the ambulance. And I can’t remember if it was in the bag and I took it out.

And I can’t believe that I can’t remember what my husband was wearing when he DIED. Like of all the things, this should be something I can remember. But I don’t and I know, logically, that continuing to beat myself up over not remembering will not do a thing but it’s like now I am OBSESSED with trying to remember. And all the laundry has been done except that so it’s not like I can tell by what’s in the pile.

I can’t stand that I can’t remember.