I just want to share a thing. A happy thing.
A happy memory. Sorry, it’s long, ☺️
I found this in an old email my husband sent to me. Background so you understand it - hubby and I were childhood/high school sweethearts, parted ways. We got back together when we were older after I exited an abusive relationship, he raised my two young kiddos. He struggled with substance abuse in his younger years, was an addictions counselor when we were married. Married almost 15 years when he died.
Last night (NYE) I was very, very sad. Today I am going to focus on how lucky I am that I had a love like this in my lifetime ❤️ Sending love to all of you, as well ❤️.
His email: (He sure like to use bold and italics 😂😂)
…….they often refer to it as a "treatment high," or when I taught (our son) to ride a bike, or helped (our daughter) out of that first tree, or especially the day you and I went to the courthouse and signed our lives away to each other...the look you had that day is in the upper tier of the "best moments in my effed up existence list." SINCERELY. No joke, wanna know what number 1 BEST, I have EVER felt is every time I've had a shite day, and there are MANY, and I lie down next to you as you sleep, wrap my arm around you, spoon, put my face sideways against your back, have my hand on some part of your skin, and then see you smile this little smile you sometimes have when you are just awake enough not to have one of your "scare the shite right out of me, I feel terrible for you, PTSD moments when I wake you up," I see it, you look so happy, safe, and at peace....then I just lay my head against your back like i already mentioned....and that every atom of my body warm feeling i get is just...indescribable...i'm not kidding, and thinking about it right now, that feeling is even better than any biochemically induced moment i've ever had, i am being more serious and sincere right now than i have been in my entire life...please accept that as a show of how much i love you, a compliment, a truly incredible thing...nothing in life can make me feel the way you do in those moments....and every single one is just as good or better than the last...