Depressed whenever I take time off work.

I don’t even enjoy my job that much, it’s Amazon, it’s boring, pretty easy, and pays okay, it’s not the most hours right now, but it’s stable and relatively no stress compared to my last job. every damn time I take a day off though, even if it’s paid, I just feel so damn miserable.

Even with my last job which I RARELY took any time off of, I just felt like a failure anytime I was off, even if they gave me 3 day weekends, but the 2nd day, I felt terrible, mood completely in the fucking floor.

I HAVE hobbies, I make music, but my music hasn’t taken off at all even after almost 2 years of doing it.

I don’t know what it is, and it pisses me off so much how I can constantly be MISERABLY bored at work, and then depressed and feeling like a failure at home. What do I even do?